When Improving Your Marriage Feels Overwhelming
I wish I could say “marriage is easy” and requires little to no effort to keep them flourishing. But relationships are never easy – including marriages. Once the honeymoon phase ends and real life begins, they require consistent work to keep them happy and successful.
One of my favorite movie lines is from Dangerous Minds. In the film, Michelle Pfeiffer’s character says to her struggling student:
“Keeping an ‘A’ is harder than getting an ‘A.’ Almost anyone can get an ‘A’ once. But keeping it – that’s an accomplishment.”
Her quote reminds me of marriage. We all start with an “A” at the altar. But maintaining our “A” is a much more strenuous and tedious process. Yet, the reward for our labor far outweighs any sacrifice required.
Whenever you start feeling like improving your marriage is too much work, ask yourself these questions:
What message am I communicating to my spouse by my reluctance to improve our marriage?
What am I teaching my kids about their future marriages by the example I am setting for them in mine?
Am I expecting to get from my spouse what I am unwilling to give him?
Am I expecting God to better my relationship without doing my part to enhance it?
I know these are tough questions. I also know some days will feel like “marital improvement” is an impossible task. But nothing worth anything is ever built in a day, week, or month. Hard work and consistency are two keys to making your marriage the best it can be – and doing your part is the first place to start, with God’s help.
Do you need prayer for this endeavor? I would love to pray for you so let me know in the comments.