Differences Unite Or Divide

Joe and I are opposites in many ways, which brought challenges to our marriage.

Joe is an extrovert to the core – charismatic, loves crowds and strangers, and can strike up a meaningful conversation with just about anyone.  He is a multi-tasker, competitive, outgoing, adventurous, yet he is not afraid to show his emotions.

I am an introvert by nature – extremely analytical, uncomfortable in crowds or the spotlight, and usually at a loss for words around strangers.  I am organized, intensely focused, discerning, quiet, and typically operate from logic instead of emotion.

After Joe and I spent the first few years of our marriage navigating “married life,” our different, yet strong personalities emerged from the shadows.  With them came an underlying current of us trying to squeeze each other into the mold of who we were rather than accepting and appreciating each other’s God-given differences.

It took a lot for us to stop viewing each other’s personality distinctions as negatives or faulty.  But eventually, with some maturity and large doses of humility under our belts, we both learned to value the diversities we brought to our marriage.

Now, we are a united team on all fronts.  When one of us is weak or lacking in any area, we rely on the other’s strength to carry us through.  We have also learned to glean from each other’s personality traits to bring balance to our own, which are usually parked at the opposite end of the spectrum from one another.

What about you and your spouse?  Are your differences uniting or dividing your marriage?