Staying Close During Changing Seasons

Does your closeness diminish as you go through different phases in your marriage?  Is it a struggle to stay connected to your spouse when your relationship experiences shifts from seen or unforeseen circumstances?

Joe and I have gone through several seasons in our 34 years of marriage.  We went from being newlyweds to living in a foreign country, to working in full-time ministry together – all while dealing with the death of Joe’s dad.  After those challenges came financial struggles, parenthood, and the empty-nest syndrome, followed by one of our children moving back home a year later.

Here are some of the non-negotiables that helped us stay close and connected during these constant shifts and trials in our relationship:

• Frequent Conversations.

  We made it a point to “check-in” with each other daily to talk about life, daily events, challenges, schedules, and fears.  Communicating with each other was key in us staying connected during the difficult seasons of our marriage.

• Consistent Breaks.

  We made sure to go on a date every week to escape from the daily stresses of life and have fun together.  We also got away together on weekends every quarter to have more uninterrupted time with just the two of us.

• Resolving Conflicts.

  Whenever we argued, we always resolved the underlying issue of the dispute each time.  Ending disagreements, arguments, or conflicts without fixing the core issue only causes it to resurface in the future with more intensity, so we determined not to let that happen.

 
These simple but effective tools have helped Joe and I stay incredibly close and bonded during some of the most challenging seasons of our lives.  It was not always easy and took tons of commitment from both of us.  But, by God’s grace and lots of prayers, we weathered the storms and came out stronger on the other side!

What about you? Do you want to stay close to your spouse during changing seasons?