When Your Spouse's Expectations Overwhelm You
I have talked to women who have completely lost themselves and their identities after years of working tirelessly to fulfill their husband’s array of expectations. Whereas other women have experienced so much resentment from those burdens that they become emotionally numb.
Neither destination is God’s will.
So many times, our expectations of each other in marriage are unrealistic and unfair. We place undue burdens on one another that ultimately undermine the unity and oneness Jesus wants for us.
If you are feeling overwhelmed by the expectations of your spouse, I want to encourage you with some things:
God has not called you into slavery.
We often confuse submission with slavery. However, biblical submission does not equate to becoming a doormat, a child, or a slave to your husband’s expectations.
Trust yourself and your discernment.
Trust the godly discernment and wisdom you have in distinguishing realistic from unrealistic expectations and resist second-guessing yourself.
Use your voice.
Spouses cannot read minds and often fail to recognize when their expectations are unbiblical and unrealistic. You need to speak up against what is unreasonable to help facilitate changes.
It is frightening how easily we embrace unbiblical and unreasonable expectations in marriage, not realizing that it eventually leads to “emotional death.” That is why honest and open communication about each other’s expectations and our own limitations is essential for our marriages to thrive and be healthy.
Have you ever felt “emotionally dead” in your relationship from the pressure of expectations?