I Could Not Shake The Nagging Feeling Inside

For years, I had begged Jesus for new opportunities to further my calling to minister to women.

You can imagine my excitement in 2019 when my husband, Joe, invited me to offer my Bible study booklets on his ministry television program.  My exhilaration only intensified when he wanted me to be a permanent fixture on the show ministering to women regularly.

From an outsider’s perspective, it seemed like a dream come true!  And, for a while, it felt like everything I had prayed for had come to fruition in unexpected ways.

But as time went by, I could not shake this nagging feeling inside that “something wasn’t right.”  I did not question my calling to minister to women.  But the unrest I felt over my involvement in the weekly television program was not sitting right in my spirit.

I shared my uneasiness with Joe on multiple occasions, telling him something felt disjointed over what I was doing.  But he really wanted me involved in television with him, so I dismissed my feelings—assuming they were “me” rather than the Holy Spirit.

Over time, the internal conflict I experienced did not go away and I could no longer ignore or dismiss what I was sensing.  I knew I needed to pull the plug on television after praying about it more and more.

When I shared the news with Joe and the production team, I was met with surprise and shock.  But I knew I had to obey Jesus’ leading with or without their support.  Thankfully, they understood and supported my decision, although it was not what they wanted to hear.

I share this story with you because we often assume “peace” is God’s tool used to guide us in our calling to ordained opportunities—and it is one of them.  But we underestimate His use of “unrest” to redirect us away from something we stepped into by mistake or when He ends an ordained season.

If you find yourself in a place of feeling something is “off” in your spirit over how you are fulfilling your calling, stop and seek Jesus for discernment and clarity.  Learn from my mistake by not dismissing or ignoring what could be the Holy Spirit redirecting or readjusting your path.